Four Steps Read online

  “I can imagine you, red faced and indignant, arms crossed and stamping your feet.”

  “That’s exactly how it went. I vowed never to eat pork again.”

  It was too much for Lori. “I can picture it now,” she said and laughed. “How long did you last?”

  “Well, I’m so pleased being fed Penelope the pig amuses you so much,” she replied, lifting her chin in the air with indignation. “And I’ll have you know I lasted a whole two weeks, until I realised pork was also bacon.”

  “Penelope? Are you serious? That’s an amazing name for a pig.”

  “Aye, I named her after a bully of a girl in my primary two classes. It seemed fitting.” She laughed along with Lori this time.

  “My brother had a vegetarian stage in his dark, brooding teens, purely because it was cool. One day, my aunt Emily told him to hand over his leather jacket for the charity shop. If he wasn’t going to eat animal meat, he wasn’t allowed to wear its skin either. You should have seen the look of disgust on his face as he weighed up his choices. He was into motorbikes and never left the house without that jacket. The phase quickly passed.”

  “I’m surprised you city kids even knew what a cow looked like. I once met a girl, at University, from London who had never seen a sheep outside of a zoo. I honestly still don’t think I’m over the shock of that.”

  “Cheeky.” Lori nudged her with an elbow. “We did go to school in Switzerland for three years so I’m familiar with the odd farmyard animal.”

  Alex smirked. “Just checking.”

  “So if you live on the family farm, does that mean your family are still there too?”

  The smile quickly slipped from Alex’s face and she turned back to the water. Lori realised she’d asked the wrong question when Alex stood up without comment and absentmindedly reeled the line back in. She took her time to recast and avoided Lori’s eye when she replied with a simple, “No.”

  It was clear this was a no-go area and Lori was certainly not going to pry, given her own past. If Alex wanted to share, she would. It was her story to tell when and with whom she wanted. Standing up next to her, Lori rested a hand on her shoulder and gave it a gentle squeeze in understanding. “No bites yet?” she asked, nodding toward the water.

  “Thankfully not.”

  “I’m confused.” Lori turned to her and raised an eyebrow. “I thought you were catching us lunch?”

  “I’ll be honest. I really just like the monotony of fishing. It’s soothing and I do my best thinking just sitting, casting a line. In fact, I only really bother with worms so I don’t look like a complete amateur if there are others around. I’m a big baby when I actually catch something.”

  Shaking her head, Lori chuckled. “So I guess we’re having brown mush again for lunch then?”

  Chapter 6

  The old man woke with a cry. Drenched in sweat and breathing hard, panicking, while scanning the room. He felt the dimly lit room spin around him as the streetlight soaked through thin curtains.

  He closed his eyes again, and furrowed his brow as the cloud moved quickly in. He chanced another look and realised it was a different room from the one he’d just been in. How did he get here so fast? Was the girl okay? He’d left before he had a chance to find out. He needed to know.

  He called for his son, once, twice, but he didn’t come. Perhaps he was still at the farm. He pushed himself up in the bed and tried to take in the unfamiliar surroundings blurred by poor vision.

  Glasses. He needed his glasses. Sidling to the edge of the bed, he felt around for them on the nightstand while calling out again, louder, to his son. He jumped as his hand knocked something from the stand. It crashed loudly on the threadbare carpet, splashing him with its contents. Finally, laying his hands on his glasses he looked down at the spilt water. “Shit.” His son would be mad.

  He moved back in the bed when he heard heavy footsteps on the stairs. Finally, some help. The door swung open and the bare bulb in the hallway flicked on.

  “For fuck’s sake, old man, what mess are you making now?” His son pulled a towel from the hook on the back of the door and threw it onto the floor. Lazily treading on it to soak up the water.

  “Sorry, I didn’t have my glasses. I couldn’t find them in this strange room. Where are we?”

  His son’s shoulders slumped. “For the last time, you stupid bugger. This is your room and has been for the last forty years.”

  The old man looked around again but the cloud wasn’t clearing, save for the girl. “Is she all right? Did you bring her here?”

  “Who are you on about now?” Picking up the fallen glass, he gave the towel a final rub across the burnt orange excuse for a carpet.

  “The girl from the farm, of course. Did you bring her back here? She needed our help.”

  He watched as the glass flew across the room, smashing against the wall and bringing a picture down amongst the shards. In a flash, his son was over him. Eyes wide as he pushed his forehead against the old man’s, forcing him back down into the pillow. He wrapped a hand around his throat and screamed, “What have I fucking told you about bringing up the girl? What have I fucking told you? Well?” Spittle flew from his son’s mouth and splattered across his face.

  He squirmed and tried to turn his head away whilst clawing at the large hand, but his head was pinned and his body paralysed with fear. “I…I…” He gasped and gulped for air, the pressure on his neck stopping any response.

  The grip loosened and he managed to choke a breath before the hand swiped across his face, snapping his head to the side and his glasses to the floor.

  Hot tears stung his eyes. He didn’t understand. He just wanted to help.

  “Jesus fucking Christ, are you going to cry?” His son picked up the glasses from the floor and threw them into his lap, shoulders sagging as he shook his head. “What the hell happened to my old man, eh?”

  Shaking, the old man fumbled his glasses back on, determined not to put a hand to his cheek that was scorched with painful heat. “I’m sorry, son, I didn’t know.”

  “That’s right. You don’t know anything and you don’t ask any more questions. Got it?”

  “Yes, yes, of course. If I could please just have some water?”

  His son glanced at the damp patch on the carpet. “Get your own goddamn water. I’m going out.”

  He didn’t move. Instead, he sat still and listened as his son moved around downstairs. He heard keys jangle and the front door close before a car finally pulled away.

  He slid from his bed, then found slippers and a dressing gown.

  He had to find the girl.

  Chapter 7

  After more coffee and the fish, thankfully, not biting, they packed up and continued the last few miles of their hike through the glen. Lori’s mood was subdued and she could feel she wasn’t the only one. Alex had gone quiet and she wondered if it was for the same reason. She was sorry it was Sunday, sorry that meant heading back to reality, and sorry they had to say good-bye so soon.

  The track eventually brought them out onto a narrow country road which they crossed to a clearing in the woods that served as a small car park for climbers. Their cars were the only two there and Alex let out a low whistle when she saw Lori’s BMW 3 Series convertible.

  “Interpreting doesn’t just pay the bills, I see.”

  It was an extravagance Lori indulged, telling herself that the time she saved in getting from London to Scotland on a regular basis by having such a fast car was worth the money.

  “You can talk,” she said, pointing to a nearly new Land Rover Defender.

  “Hey, I own a farm. It’s practically the law to own a Land Rover,” Alex quipped while laughing.

  They unloaded their rucksacks into the cars and Alex rounded Frank up, putting him in the back of the Land Rover. She cracked the window just enough for him to poke his nose out. She wandered over to the BMW where Lori was changing from chunky hiking boots to well-worn trainers more comfortable for the long
journey.

  Lori stood up out of the driver seat then leant back against the car, eyeing Alex who was looking distractedly at her feet. She didn’t want this to be the last time she saw Alex. She had meant what she said about feeling like they would be good friends and she knew this wasn’t meant to be good-bye.

  She was about to speak when Alex looked up from her feet as if suddenly struck with inspiration. Tilting her head as if sizing Lori up, she looked her dead in the eye, and stroked her chin in the same mischievous way she had that morning.

  “So, about that dark and naughty side of yours? I’m not quite sure I believe you have one.”

  Lori raised an eyebrow, playing along, “And what makes you think that?”

  Alex looked at her knowingly, flashing that dimple again. “Your face is much too innocent and honest. I don’t think you have it in you to take a risk.”

  “Oh, you don’t think so.”

  “I don’t. You’re going to have to prove it.”

  “And how might you suggest I do that?” Lori replied, surprising herself with the hint of suggestion in her voice.

  Alex stepped forward into her space, effectively pinning her against the car.

  Lori felt her heartbeat pick up pace, taken aback at having Alex so close without warning. Yes, she’d admitted to herself that Alex was attractive and had enjoyed the friendly flirting, but Lori was straight and on the rebound, there couldn’t be anything more than friendship between them.

  Yet here they were and suddenly it wasn’t so innocent.

  “It’s simple,” Alex whispered, tilting her head up to stare into Lori’s eyes again.

  Lori couldn’t tear her gaze away and realised she wasn’t the only one feeling the effects of their closeness. She could feel the heat radiating off Alex, hear the quick, short breaths she took as her eyes searched Lori’s. Was she searching for reassurance that this wasn’t a one-sided thing?

  Alex raised her hand, placing it lightly on Lori’s chest. The smile that appeared told Lori she had found her answer in the form of her pounding heart.

  “What’s simple?” she whispered back. Glancing down at Alex’s lips, she waited for a response. She realised how close they were to hers, plump and red from the cold.

  “Don’t let this be good-bye.”

  The intensity of the moment, and the emotion that came with it, overwhelmed Lori. She slid sideways against the car, moving away from Alex and breaking the spell. The look of disappointment on Alex’s face was hard to miss. She quickly reached for one of her hands and tried for a reassuring smile.

  “Are you sure you mean that? I mean, after the embarrassment of losing to me in a tickle fight, I thought you’d want to be well rid of me.”

  “Are you kidding? That’s one of the reasons I want to see you again. I need an opportunity for payback.” She looked at the ground again somewhat sheepishly. “Also I don’t mind admitting, I’m strangely drawn to you and I’d like, in the very least, to call you a friend. I might have been tipsy, but my whisky-brain does remember you prophesising that last night.” Her hand squeezed Lori’s and it felt reassuring. “Plus,” she continued, “it’s been a long time since I’ve met someone so interesting. Although chickens and goats aren’t much competition.”

  “Oi!” Lori popped her on the arm. “Don’t forget I can take your short arse down.”

  “So is that a yes?” replied Alex while rubbing her arm in mock hurt. “In the name of friendship, can I please have your number?”

  Lori reached into the car and produced her mobile phone. “Sure. You can even have my e-mail too.”

  “Wow, aren’t I privileged,” Alex said with a giggle, then pulled her phone out of her pocket.

  They swapped numbers and e-mail addresses, and both leaned back against the car and stared into the woods. Lori wasn’t ready to part but was unsure what else to say.

  She felt Alex’s hand creep into hers again, linking their fingers together when they met no resistance.

  Lori looked down at their hands. She couldn’t remember the last time Andrew had offered such a simple show of affection. She wasn’t quite sure how they’d gone from solo hikers sharing a bothy to holding hands in the space of a day. But she had a long drive ahead of her to think about it, so, for now, she just went with it.

  As if reading her thoughts Alex broke the quiet. “I guess you better hit the road. You’ve a long journey ahead.”

  “Yeah, you’re probably right. Early start tomorrow morning.”

  Alex stepped away from the car and turned to stand in front of her. She smiled and squeezed Lori’s hand again before reluctantly releasing it. “So…I guess I’ll speak to you soon?” she said, starting to walk backward to her own car.

  “Wait.” Lori reached out and grabbed her hand back. “Where I come from we hug our friends good-bye.”

  She didn’t hesitate to envelop Alex in her arms, feeling hers slip around her waist and gently tighten. Lori took a deep breath to calm the butterflies going crazy again at the close contact, closed her eyes, and held on a little longer. Alex didn’t seem to mind.

  Finally, Lori pulled back, holding Alex at arm’s length and she saw the same look of wonder in her face that she was sure had just crossed her own.

  “As my dad always used to say, it’s not good-bye, just see you later. Although I’m sure he stole that line from somewhere.”

  Alex smiled at that, both dimples appearing.

  She got into her car without another word and, with a wave to Alex still standing in the same spot, turned out onto the road toward home.

  Chapter 8

  Alex jumped down from the Land Rover to open the gate that led to her farm. She let Frank out of the car, knowing he would enjoy running the last half mile home after four hours of being cooped up.

  Normally, she would have had the music up, singing at the top of her voice while he yelped and howled along. Not today. She hadn’t been much fun and he’d quickly gone to sleep.

  She couldn’t stop thinking about Lori. It was as simple as that. She kept glancing at her hand while it held the wheel and she would swear she could still feel Lori’s thumb caressing the back of it.

  She smacked the wheel and swore. Lori was straight and she was also straight out of a relationship. It might have been with a guy who, to be honest, sounded like an arrogant dick. But he was still a guy, and she had loved him. Alex was sure there would be a string of guys waiting to take his place.

  Maybe being there for her at such an emotional time, just to listen and comfort her, had confused something for Lori. She’d heard her friends joke many a time after a break up that they wished they were lesbians because men were arseholes, only to call the next week telling her about the latest male love of their lives.

  She chastised herself. Since when did she start assigning labels? Attraction can’t be reasoned with or named. Besides, how well did she really know her? So what if she hadn’t confessed to any previous Sapphic adventures. Maybe that meant she shouldn’t assume.

  She thought about Jess and how proud she’d be of her and what was going through her head right now. Rather than predicting future demise and running for the hills before anything even had a chance to begin, like she’d being doing ever since Rachel, she was talking herself into a potential mess.

  What was it Jess always said? Break it down to its simplest form? Alex made a mental list of the positives that she knew about the situation.

  She was single. So was Lori. They’d exchanged numbers. There was a definite connection which she knew they had both felt.

  Alex thought about the intensity with which her body responded just being close to Lori, she hadn’t wanted to let go, the urge to protect and be there for her was overwhelming. Add to that the undeniable fact she was beautiful. And ridiculously smart, and funny, and sensitive, and her touch made Alex’s skin hum.

  That was it. There was no way Alex could let this pass her by. She was a stronger person now, in charge of her own life and happiness.
She could handle this.

  Resolved to take control and make the first move, she let herself into the house, turned off the alarm, and pulled out her mobile phone.

  * * *

  A couple of hours from home, Lori saw her phone light up and vibrate on the passenger seat; Alex’s name appeared across the screen. She glanced at the clock and smiled. Six hours. That’s how long it had taken for Alex to call. She was impressed. Especially given she’d had a four-hour journey of her own to make.

  She let it go to voicemail, not wanting their first phone call to be shouted through a terrible Bluetooth connection. The ping announcing a message shot a surprising wave of excitement through her. Such a small thing. Scary, but somehow full of possibility at the same time. She pressed her foot on the accelerator, the flashing message light propelling her home.

  Chapter 9

  Home at last, Lori threw her rucksack into a hallway cupboard. It could wait to be unpacked. The message light on her home phone was flashing so she hit the play button to listen whilst stripping off layers of clothing getting ready for a long overdue shower.

  “You have eight new messages,” the machine told her. Lori groaned because she knew who the majority would be from.

  “Message one: Lori its Andrew. Listen I hate the way we left things last night. I know we both said some things we didn’t mean. Let’s talk about it. Please call me.”

  She sighed as she kicked off her trainers and when the option came, pressed delete. She’d meant every word and wasn’t about to take anything back, including Andrew.

  “Message two: Lori, me again. I don’t know if you’re away or not. I tried your mobile, but it seems to be off so I stopped by but you weren’t home. I hope you aren’t avoiding me. I just want to talk. Call me.”